Being Sixteen

This is my response to the daily prompt: Only Sixteen


A lot of changes happen in one year.  What more in three years?  My 16 year-old self was at the point of adjustments.  I was starting college and didn’t know what else to expect besides drastic changes.

It was the first time for me to be the new kid in school.  I know we all don’t know anybody in first year of college, but that was completely an alien feeling for me.  I never changed school since I was 5.  I don’t know how to be friendly without sounding desperate for a company.  I was a shy kid and trying to talk to another human being scares the fetus in me.  What if they don’t like me? What if the other kids still think like a high school brat and won’t even bother to socialize with socially-impaired babies like me?  For three days, I was tip-toeing around campus like I’m in a foreign country that speaks a foreign language. I must admit, I probably looked pathetic on my first week in Engineering.

Photo by Sam Dean/
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Well luckily, those “me times” didn’t last too long.  Thank heavens! Although, I was still the quiet kid in the group who says only a few things when there’s a chance.  Back in high school, I was the same person.  I don’t talk much in the group but I listen.  I brought that person to college. Days go by and every minute I spend with my friends lets me know who they are.  Not just as blockmates, but as friends.

I learned how to trust, although I would have to say that up to now I still don’t tell my friends everything I feel.  But, that’s not because they don’t listen to me like how I do to them.  It’s me who won’t allow myself to speak.  A lot of changes happen in one year, but if there’s anything that has not changed with me, it’s that I don’t trust my emotions to anyone.

My 16 year-old self was a lot happier, and then the same year we lost my father.  I’m still happy right now but I think three years ago, I was a happier person.  Each day since that day we lost him, I believe I got stronger.  I knew I needed to be strong because those things happen.

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cto

This quote says it all for me.


Change comes by force, but we are given options.  It’s still our choice how different things are going to be. 

 

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